Before I even begin, I must first acknowledge that this first published blog in nearly 11 months – I am ashamed – okay I am being a tad dramatic (weird I know) but I am not proud of myself by any stretch of the imagination. I pride myself on being self aware and often jump up on my soapbox to preach about going after what you want most in life, yet when the microscope is pointed back at me- my short comings on the path to self discovery are glaringly present.
What do I want? Now if that isn’t a loaded question I don’t know what is – partially because my last name rhymes with Shmennedy in which my natural instinct is to make even the simplest of questions more difficult – but also because it is tough question to answer in a concise way. Not to mention the fact that what we want will likely continue to evolve as we age - then of course there are the tangible and intangible wants – and so I digress…..
SO..What DO I want? I want to be a successful writer, I want to write a screenplay with my sisters, I want to run a marathon someday, I want to travel the world, I think I want to be a wife and mother when the time is right, I want to play the piano well, I want to speak Italian fluently, I want to have a food and wine blog, I want to learn to ballroom dance, I want to be an artist, I want to live a life full of love, laughter, substance and purpose. If you can pick up what I am putting down…I want a lot of things – and this is short laundry list. The intent of this entry however was not to point out that I am arguably an overly ambitious/slightly narcotic member of society but to prove that the bulk of the “wants” I have listed above are within in my control to achieve. So why then, are there still so many on my list? Because I am as they say, my own worst enemy. We are all quick to rattle of our wish lists and then have the audacity to throw a fit when they don’t magically fall into our laps. Most things in this life worth a damn require effort.
The point that I haven’t blogged in nearly 11 months is a prime example of me getting in my own way. Didn’t I say that I want to be a writer? Last I checked editors weren’t knocking on doors asking if there was a member of the house who had a burning desire to write, if you have heard of the phenomenon – than please do share, but as far as I know – this does not exist. So – why am I not making it a priority? Sure I have been busy but I find time to do other things – shouldn’t I find time to hone my craft as well? I want to run a marathon? Then why haven’t I? I want to have a food and wine blog? Then why don’t I – or at the very least why don’t I maintain the one I started! Somewhere between time, priorities and emotional hang ups you can find the answers to those questions.
Since my last entry (eons ago) I have been given the opportunity to enter a new career in the Wine and Spirits industry, it is seemingly a leap in the right direction to so many of my ‘wants’ and I am truly grateful. When people ask me how I found this job, I say that in the middle of my belly aching about my then complacecy that someone heard me. My mentor for a lack of a better term happened be dating someone in the field and voila – I had the in. It is important for me to celebrate this victory as it only validates my thesis, that you need to be willing to do the work to reach the outcome, for as Carol Burnette said, “no one can change your life for you.”
Beyond the sense of accomplishment you feel from reaching a particular goal, it also contributes to your overall sense of worth and in my case helps ease the buzz of anxiety in my ear asking me if I am truly happy. Life is busy, family is chaotic, money is tight, schedules are impossible, goals can be intimidating, excuses are easy to come by - but if you have a list of wants in one hand do a bit of self inventory to see how you might be standing in your own way. Slowly begin to break down the barriers to your ‘wants’ and you might just surprise yourself. Make your goals a priority, decide that you will do everything in your power to accomplish those goals. The simple act of making this entry will no doubt help me sleep better tonight knowing I am at the very least working towards my goal. What do you want – and how will you make it happen?
What do I want? Now if that isn’t a loaded question I don’t know what is – partially because my last name rhymes with Shmennedy in which my natural instinct is to make even the simplest of questions more difficult – but also because it is tough question to answer in a concise way. Not to mention the fact that what we want will likely continue to evolve as we age - then of course there are the tangible and intangible wants – and so I digress…..
SO..What DO I want? I want to be a successful writer, I want to write a screenplay with my sisters, I want to run a marathon someday, I want to travel the world, I think I want to be a wife and mother when the time is right, I want to play the piano well, I want to speak Italian fluently, I want to have a food and wine blog, I want to learn to ballroom dance, I want to be an artist, I want to live a life full of love, laughter, substance and purpose. If you can pick up what I am putting down…I want a lot of things – and this is short laundry list. The intent of this entry however was not to point out that I am arguably an overly ambitious/slightly narcotic member of society but to prove that the bulk of the “wants” I have listed above are within in my control to achieve. So why then, are there still so many on my list? Because I am as they say, my own worst enemy. We are all quick to rattle of our wish lists and then have the audacity to throw a fit when they don’t magically fall into our laps. Most things in this life worth a damn require effort.
The point that I haven’t blogged in nearly 11 months is a prime example of me getting in my own way. Didn’t I say that I want to be a writer? Last I checked editors weren’t knocking on doors asking if there was a member of the house who had a burning desire to write, if you have heard of the phenomenon – than please do share, but as far as I know – this does not exist. So – why am I not making it a priority? Sure I have been busy but I find time to do other things – shouldn’t I find time to hone my craft as well? I want to run a marathon? Then why haven’t I? I want to have a food and wine blog? Then why don’t I – or at the very least why don’t I maintain the one I started! Somewhere between time, priorities and emotional hang ups you can find the answers to those questions.
Since my last entry (eons ago) I have been given the opportunity to enter a new career in the Wine and Spirits industry, it is seemingly a leap in the right direction to so many of my ‘wants’ and I am truly grateful. When people ask me how I found this job, I say that in the middle of my belly aching about my then complacecy that someone heard me. My mentor for a lack of a better term happened be dating someone in the field and voila – I had the in. It is important for me to celebrate this victory as it only validates my thesis, that you need to be willing to do the work to reach the outcome, for as Carol Burnette said, “no one can change your life for you.”
Beyond the sense of accomplishment you feel from reaching a particular goal, it also contributes to your overall sense of worth and in my case helps ease the buzz of anxiety in my ear asking me if I am truly happy. Life is busy, family is chaotic, money is tight, schedules are impossible, goals can be intimidating, excuses are easy to come by - but if you have a list of wants in one hand do a bit of self inventory to see how you might be standing in your own way. Slowly begin to break down the barriers to your ‘wants’ and you might just surprise yourself. Make your goals a priority, decide that you will do everything in your power to accomplish those goals. The simple act of making this entry will no doubt help me sleep better tonight knowing I am at the very least working towards my goal. What do you want – and how will you make it happen?